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One day, Plato asked his teacher,  "What is love? How can I find it?"

The teacher answered, "There’s a large wheat field in
front. Walk there without turning back, and take just one leaf. If you can find
one leaf that you think is extraordinary than all the other leaves, it means
you have found love."

So Plato walked… and not long after that, he came back
empty handed. The teacher asked him, "Why didn’t you bring any leaf?"

Plato replied, "I can only bring just one leaf and when
I walk, I can’t turn back. Actually, I have found one extraordinary leaf, but I
dont know whether there’s anymore extraordinary leaf ahead, so I didn’t take
that leaf. When I walked further, I realized that all the other leaves I found
are not as extraordinary as I’ve found previously. In the end, I didn’t take
any single leaf."

Then the teacher told him, "So… that is love…. and
you lost it!"

Another day, Plato asked his teacher again, "What is
marriage? How do I know that I have found it?"

The teacher answered, "There is a forest in front.
Please walk there and don’t look back. You can only cut one tree, and cut the
one that you think is the highest, because that means you have found
marriage."

Plato walks there, and he came back not long after that
bringing one tree. The tree is not a very good tree and not a very tall one
either. It’s just a plain and ordinary tree.

The teacher asked him, "Why did you cut that kind of
tree?" Plato answered, "Because, according to my previous experience,
after walking thru the wheat field, I came back with nothing. So this time,
when I saw this tree, and I think this tree is not so bad, I decided to cut it
and bring it here. I don’t want to risk losing it again."

And the teacher said, "Well… that is marriage and you
found it! Marriage is the continuity of love… The more you look for love, you
will find nothing… Love is in your heart… the place where you can control
your desire and your hope to find something better… When you have endless hope
and wish of love, you will only get emptiness…because you wont get anything and
time can not be turned back. Accept love for what it is…

Marriage is a process of taking chances, and you choose the
best option among all the alternatives… If you want to have a perfect match
and a perfect marriage, you are wasting time… because there is no perfect
marriage."

The first secret? the power of THOUGHT.
Love begins with our thoughts. We become what we think about. Loving thoughts create loving experiences and loving relationships. Affirmations can change our beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and others. If we want to love someone, we need to consider their needs and desires.

The second secret? the power of GIVING.
If you want to receive love, all you have to do is give it! The more love you give, the more you will receive. To love is to give of yourself, freely and unconditionally. Practice random acts of kindness. Before committing to a relationship, ask not what the other person will be able to give to you, but rather what will you be able to give them. The secret formula of a happy, lifelong, loving relationship is to always focus on what you can give instead of what you can take.

The third secret? the power of RESPECT.
You cannot love anyone or anything unless you first respect them. The first person you need to respect is yourself. To begin to gain self-respect ask yourself, "What do I respect about myself?" To gain respect for others, even those you may dislike, ask yourself "What do I respect about them?"

The fourth secret? the power of FRIENDSHIP.
To find a true love, you must first find a true friend. Love does not consist of gazing into each other’s eyes, but rather looking outward together in the same direction. To love someone completely you must love them for who they are, not what they look like. Friendship is the soil through which love’s seeds grow. If you want to bring love into a relationship, you must first bring friendship.

The fifth secret? the power of LETTING GO.
If you love something, let it free. If it comes back to you, it’s yours; if it doesn’t, it never was. Even in a loving relationship, people need their own space. If we want to learn to love, we must first learn to forgive and let go of past hurts and grievances. Love means letting go of our fears, prejudices, egos and conditions. "Today I let go of all my fears, the past has no power over me - today is the beginning of a new life."

The sixth secret? the power of COMMUNICATION.
When we learn to communicate openly and honestly, life changes. To love someone is to communicate with them. Let the people you love know that you love them and appreciate them. Never be afraid to say those three magic words: "I Love You." Never let an opportunity pass to praise someone. Always leave someone you love with a loving word - it could be the last time you see them! If you were about to die but could make telephone calls to the people you loved, who would you call, what would you say and … why are you waiting?

The seventh  secret? the power of COMMITMENT.
If you want to have love in abundance, you must be committed to it, and that commitment will be reflected in your thoughts and actions. Commitment is the true test of love. If you want to have loving relationships, you must be committed to loving relationships. When you are committed to someone or something, quitting is never an option. Commitment distinguishes a fragile relationship from a strong one.

The eighth secret? the power of PASSION.
Passion ignites love and keeps it alive. Lasting passion does not come through physical attraction alone, it comes from deep commitment, enthusiasm, interest and excitement. Passion can be recreated by recreating past experiences when you felt passionate. Spontaneity and surprises produce passion. The essence of love and happiness are the same; all we need to do is to live each day with passion.

The ninth secret? the power of TOUCH.
Touch is one of the most powerful expressions of love, breaking down barriers and bonding relationships. Touch changes our physical and emotional states and makes us more receptive to love.

The tenth secret? the power of TRUST.
Trust is essential in all loving relationships. Without it, one person becomes suspicious, anxious and fearful and the other person feels trapped and emotionally suffocated. You cannot love someone completely unless you trust them completely. Act as if your relationship with the person you love will never end. One of the ways you can tell whether a person is right for you is to ask yourself, "Do I trust them completely and unreservedly?" If the answer is "no", think carefully before making a commitment.

King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned
by the
monarch of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch
could have killed him but
was moved by Arthur’s
youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his

freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult
question. Arthur would
have a year to figure out the
answers and, if after a year, he still had no
answer,
he would be put to death.

The question?….What do women really want?
Such a question would perplex even
the most
knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed
an impossible query.
But, since it was better than death,
he accepted the monarch’s proposition to
have an answer
by year’s end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone:
the princess, the
priests, the wise men and even the court
jester. He spoke with everyone, but no
one could give him
a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch,
for only she would have the
answer.

But the price would be high; as the witch was famous
throughout the kingdom for
the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but
to talk to the
witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he
would have to agree to her price
first.

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the
Knights of
the Round Table and Arthur’s closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous,
had only one
tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc.
He had never encountered
such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such
a terrible burden,
but Lancelot, learning of the proposal,
spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big a sacrifice compared to Arthur’s life
and the
preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered
Arthur’s question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered….
is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch
had uttered a great truth
and that Arthur’s life would be spared.

And so it was, the neighbouring monarch granted Arthur his
freedom and Lancelot
and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself
for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom.
But, what a sight
awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen, lay
before
him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when
she appeared as a
witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible
deformed self only half the time
and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during! the day….or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful
woman to show
off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of
his castle, an old witch?
Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch
during the day, but by night, a
beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous,
intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his
question, said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the
time
because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of
her own life.

Now…..what is the moral to this story?

The moral is…..If you don’t let a woman have her own way….
Things are going to get ugly.

1. DO NOT INTERFERE IN OTHERS’
BUSINESS UNLESS ASKED
   
— Most of us create our own problems by
interfering too often in others’ affairs. We do so because somehow we have
convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic,
and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to
the right direction, our direction. This kind of attitude on our part denies
the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God, for God
has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or
act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because they
are prompted to do so by the Divine within them. There is God to look after
everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will have your
peace.

2. FORGET and FORGIVE

— This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often nurture ill
feeling inside our heart for the person who insults or harms us. We foster
grievances, which in turn results in loss of sleep, develops of stomach ulcer,
high blood pressure and many other ailments that stealthily gnaws us from
within. We forget that the insult or injury was done to us once but by
nourishing the grievance we go on excavating the wound forever. Therefore it is
essential that we cultivate the art of forgiving and forgetting. Believe in the
justice of God and the doctrine of Karma. Let Him judge the act of the one who
insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forget, forgive, and
march on.

 3. DO NOT CRAVE FOR RECOGNITION

— This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without
selfish motive. They may praise you today because you are rich and have power
but no sooner you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and start
criticizing you. Moreover, each person is a mortal with a bundle of defects in
them. No one individual is picture perfect. Then why do you value the words of
praise of another mortal like you? Why do you crave for such false recognition
and lose your peace of mind if the world does not praise you? Believe in yourself.
People’s praises do not last long and are not worth it. Do your duties
ethically and sincerely and leave the rest to God.

4. DO NOT BE JEALOUS

—  We all have experienced how jealousy can
disturb our peace of mind. You know you work harder than your colleagues in the
office but they get promotions, you do not. You started a business several
years ago but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only
one year old. There are several examples like these in every walk of life.
Should you be jealous? No, remember everybody’s life is shaped by his previous
Karma that has now become his destiny. If you are destined to be rich, not all
the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either.
Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not
get you anywhere, but will only give you restlessness.

5. CHANGE YOURSELF ACCORDING TO
THE ENVIRONMENT

— If you try to change the environment
single handedly, the chances are you may fail. Instead, change yourself to suit
the environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has remained
unfriendly for you, will mysteriously appear to be congenial and harmonious.

6. ENDURE WHAT CANNOT BE CURED

— This is the best way to turn a disadvantage
into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments,
irritations and accidents that are beyond our control. We must learn to put up
with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God
will it so, so be it". God’s logic is beyond our comprehension. Believe it
and you will gain in patience, in inner strength, in will power.

7. DO NOT BITE MORE than YOU CAN
CHEW

— This maxim should be always remembered. We
often tend to take more responsibilities  than we are capable to carry out. This is done
to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that
may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your
external activities. If you have extra time, then spend it in an inward life of
prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your
mind, which make you restless. Fewer the thoughts, greater is the peace of
mind.

8. MEDITATE REGULARLY

— Meditation makes the mind thoughtless. This
is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it. If you meditate
earnestly for half an hour every day, you will tend to become calm during the
remaining twenty-three and a half hours. Your mind will not be disturbed as
much as before. You must gradually increase the period of daily meditation. You
may think this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will
increase your efficiency and you will turn out more work in less time.

9. NEVER LEAVE THE MIND VACANT

— Empty mind is the devil’s workshop. All
evil deeds start in the mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive,
something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your
interest. You must decide what you value more - money or peace of mind. Your
hobby, like social work or temple work may not always earn you more money, but
you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even if you are resting
physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God’s name
(japa).

10. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE and
NEVER REGRET

— Do not waste time in wondering
"should I or shouldn’t I?" Days, weeks, months and years may be
wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you
can never anticipate all future happenings. Always remember God has His own
plan too. Value your time and do things. It does not matter if you fail the
first time. You can rectify your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting
back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes but do not
brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET! Whatever happened was destined to happen
only that way. Take it as the will of God. You do not have the power to alter
the course of God’s will. Why cry over the spilt milk?

He met her at a party. She was so outstanding, many guys
chasing after her, while he was so
normal, nobody paid attention to him.

At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was
surprised but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee
shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, and she
thought to herself, "Please, let me go home…"

Suddenly he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I’d
like to put it in my coffee."
Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red but still, he put the
salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously, "Why you have this
hobby?" He replied, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I
liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now
every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my

hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living
there." While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That’s
his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his
homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has
responsibility of home…Then she also started to speak, spoke about her
faraway
hometown, her childhood, her family.

That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They
continued to date.
She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had
tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story
was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince,
and then they were living the happy life… And, every time she made coffee for
him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that’s the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said, "My dearest,
please forgive me, forgive my whole life’s lie. This was the only lie I said to
you—the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at
that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to
change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our
communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was
too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything…Now I’m
dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth, I don’t like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste… But I have had the
salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything
I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If
I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my
whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."

Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone
asked her, "What’s the taste of salty coffee?" She replied,
"It’s sweet."

Lesson of the Story: love is not to forget but to forgive, not to see but understand, not to hear but to listen,
not to let go but

HOLD

ON